Victoria Harkless
Assistant Editor-In-Chief
Being a child in a divorced (or never married) family is a complex thing. It is not two Christmases or other holidays, well it is but not in the fun sort of way. It is two of everything with both families pushing against one another often creating uncomfortable situations. These uncomfortable situations are often a result of biological parents putting spouse’s needs in front of their own childrens.
A parent should never put their spouse’s needs above their kids. For instance if the child’s car has been undriveable for a week and has yet to be looked at, a parent should not run and fix their spouse’s car.
It is simply irresponsible and results in everyone feeling uncomfortable. Especially when the holidays are coming up and everyone knows it will just make things worse.
Parents also should not ignore their child’s needs no matter how minor, like instead of going to the store for school things, the parent is spending time with the spouse. Even if you go after it is still not the same and makes the child feel like a second option, and that is something no child should have to deal with.
This does not even take into account the possibility of a parent having another child. Spreading attention that is already spread thin is hard and makes everyone within the group feel unappreciated.
If the child is young the older kids will be like background characters in the main characters (the younger kids) life. It is not exactly always the younger kid, when an older child plays a sport the younger kid can feel forgotten.
This results in a competition among children and that competition often creates a rather hostile environment. It also creates an environment for more fights and fights that are more aggressive and last for longer frames of time.
Parenting is hard enough when together but doing it separately when more than one relationship acquires a lot of attention is nearly impossible and leads to people getting their feelings hurt.
Image Credit: Emiliano Vittoriosi on Unsplash
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